Happy Lovers Day!
That was very entertaining, Sabin. Good luck getting the girl. Sounds like you're on the right track. I would avoid wallowing in Friend Valley for too long (you're approaching point-of-no-return status where that's concerned). You can only play the understanding, nerdy sidekick for so long until you're permanently ghetto-ized into that role. You need to strike the balance between that side of you that she obviously is drawn to and the more alpha, dominant role it sounds like she also craves.
You need to make a bold, hard move the next time you're alone with her. I have a feeling it'll work out in your favor. It sounds like this chick is being pulled in way too many directions. You need to point her in the right one and take control. You need to guide her to your cock, if I may be so bold. At the very least, you need to just grab her, in mid-neurotic monologue and kiss the hell out of her.
And, since you asked for the gay perspective, if I'm seeing a guy and we haven't hooked up by the second date, meeting, whatever, we're just gonna be friends. That's it. Oh, and, yes, it's a lot easier to get laid being gay.
Never underestimate a gay man's advice/perspective on straight relationships, too. I've been on the other end of so many straight girl confessions, I know every one in the book and this is pretty much textbook. She wants you to make a move.
FYI, drugs are for losers.
Edited By flipp525 on 1234905394
You need to make a bold, hard move the next time you're alone with her. I have a feeling it'll work out in your favor. It sounds like this chick is being pulled in way too many directions. You need to point her in the right one and take control. You need to guide her to your cock, if I may be so bold. At the very least, you need to just grab her, in mid-neurotic monologue and kiss the hell out of her.
And, since you asked for the gay perspective, if I'm seeing a guy and we haven't hooked up by the second date, meeting, whatever, we're just gonna be friends. That's it. Oh, and, yes, it's a lot easier to get laid being gay.
Never underestimate a gay man's advice/perspective on straight relationships, too. I've been on the other end of so many straight girl confessions, I know every one in the book and this is pretty much textbook. She wants you to make a move.
FYI, drugs are for losers.
Edited By flipp525 on 1234905394
"The mantle of spinsterhood was definitely in her shoulders. She was twenty five and looked it."
-Gone With the Wind by Margaret Mitchell
-Gone With the Wind by Margaret Mitchell
Sha-la-la-la-la-laHustler wrote:Sabin, Am I allowed to give you an advice? Just, kiss the girl.
Don’t be scared
You got the mood prepared
Go on and kiss the girl
Sha-la-la-la-la-la
Don’t stop now
Don’t try to hide it how
You wanna kiss the girl
Sha-la-la-la-la-la
Float along
Listen to the song
The song say kiss the girl
Sha-la-la-la-la-la
Music play
Do what the music say
You wanna kiss the girl
"It's the least most of us can do, but less of us will do more."
I would say this. Stay optimistic but realistic and take a breather when it feels like things are going bat-shit crazy.Sabin wrote:...or I'm overanalyzing this too much and I need to just roll with these perceived head games and just stay the course through the storm of the next week until we can hang out while composing a list of at least ten things a day I can do to make her laugh and also remind her that I am a sexual creature.
"It's the least most of us can do, but less of us will do more."
My Valentine's Day began at 12:00AM in the car of a beautiful actress that I grew up watching while we smoked a bowl and talked. It ended at 11:30PM that night when she dropped off the laptop I had left in there. It was an incredibly confusing mini-narrative that I have no idea what to make of.
I had been introduced to her by some mutual friends who were crashing at her place. Keep in mind: she is gorgeous. I don't swing wildly at balls I have no chance of hitting. I'm basically a T-Ball Man. If it's there and safe, I'm in. She. Is. Gorgeous. And a nerd. Massive nerd. So nerdy she doubted my nerdiness. So I'm at her apartment a few nights ago with my friends, thinking I have no chance in hell with this woman. But there we are. It's four in the morning and we're still talking. We part ways and I go home.
Two nights later, it is Game Night at her place. We start playing Clue which everyone becomes incredibly too stoned to play. I'm no pot-smoker anymore and I make it a point not to smoke in Los Angeles because these people do not fuck around with their weed. It is strong. So I'm so off my ass I forget to move my car at 2 in the morning. Game Night things out. Our mutual friends begin making out on her couch and Cute Nerd and I decide to leave. She tells me that she has to pick up her cats from her parents' house and bring them over.
(keeping in mind, Cute Nerd as I've decided to call her looks nothing like she does on her imdb page. Nothing. On that page, she is hot as hell. In real life, she is a cute nerd. That is so much rarer.)
I'm helping her bring her cats-plural over. Three of them. One of them, basically a dinosaur. Shits like one too. This cat threw up, shit, and pissed his crate such that we had to abandon it on the road, bring the cat back, and them continue back to her house to drop the cats off. After which, it was four, we talked for a while, and then I went home with a $58 ticket.
Then Valentine's Eve! I need to know if this chick's got a boyfriend pretty quickly or I'm going to end up doing something and getting hurt - NOTE: this is the rare occasion, I really, really wished I just went for it. I'm a terrible "Go for it"-er because it never entirely works out - so I go to a bar where everyone is at. We talk a little and I'm pulled off to the side by Marisa Mutual Friend who tells me some inside advice: ask her out. Immediately. She likes you. No boyfriend.
I do a party in my head and soon after, Cute Nerd asks me to go help her get her car back from where she parked it. She is subleasing her place to a guy named Anthony and needs to pick up a package before getting her car. So I drive her to the apartment and stand outside. She tells me she'll come back down, smoke me retarded, and we'll see what everyone is up to. So, I start to break down the most adorable way to ask her out in my head.
She comes back down twenty minutes later and I get into her car. Our friends call. They want to go to another bar and back with someone else. It's just us. Me and Cute Nerd. In her car. Getting inebriated.
Then she starts talking about Douchebag Stoner Neighbor. DSN smokes too much weed and reads too much into things, and while she lived there he made it a point to try to kiss her despite her alleged obvious disinterest. He moved onto writing handwritten letters on moleskin to her. It was annoying.
Excuse me for a second:
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!!!!
I can't ask her out now! Not that she just hung out with that guy. That doesn't begin to work! I can't juxtapose DSN with my romantic interests. So I basically say, fuck it. Not tonight. I'll just kick it, be funny, get high, and do this another night...
(me then her)
"When are Zach and Marissa leaving?"
"Thursday. I can't wait. I can't believe I've only known you this long. it's crazy. Things are crazy right now. I'm so tired and these guys are running me dry. And I'm helping my parents move tomorrow. It's just exhausting. I just want to hang out in downtown Los Angeles and explore. We should do that."
(nice.)
"Also, I dig this guy in Chicago - "
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!!!!
" - but I really dig you. I mean, I really, really like your opinion and I want you to read my stuff and I want to read yours, and just hang out. And, like, I think you're really attractive. I'm really attracted to you. And I could be talking out my ass because I don't know if you think the same thing about me and I probably am but -"
(at this point, I'm basically doing the quiet "No, no, no!" but she's still talking and I halfway want to see if it's going to go into the vicinity of "We should fuck in the car right now.")
(also, BTW: kissing mid-sentence needs to become popular again. It would solve so many issues. I'm aware that it's not so I didn't.)
"- even though things are really confusing, I think we should hang out, and mess around and stuff in, like, a non-committal sexual relatio - hold on."
PHONE RINGS! It's Anthony! She begins to argue with Anthony on the phone for the next ten minutes. Mood ruined. The clock begins. I have...God, I don't even know how long before I'm lost in the friend zone forever. During the phone call, she starts driving over to my car to let me out. She is very stoned, very in her head, and very not in the mood anymore. I mention that we should probably make out before the mood is over and she agrees but she's so tired - and looks it. So I leave...
...MY FUCKING LAPTOP IN HER CAR. And for whatever reason, I am too stoned to open my fucking front door because the lock does a thing. So I sleep in my car.
Next morning, she is helping her parents move. I mention my laptop. She says we'll have to reconvene.
Hours go by. I take a shower, job, clean up a bit. I get a text.
"What are you doing in two hours?"
I respond: nothing. Time passes.
"What is your address?"
I mention it w/out Blvd, Ave, or Dr. I ask if we're going out or hanging out.
"Is it blvd, ave, or dr?"
Blvd.
"Great. I'll be there in 45 minutes.
"
Now, if there are people in her car, we're going out and that's okay. If there are not people in her car, there is a chance we are hanging out. And I am having sex tonight. I inform my roommates of my situation and the across the board synopsis is that I am probably having sex tonight...
I don't believe in signs but on that day, one of my roommates drove back from Vegas having just broken up with his stripper girlfriend AND a former ex of mine who spent our entire relationship trying to avoid physical encounter with me before she started dating an actor I had cast in the film she was Script Supervising on who was playing a part based on myself (gasp!) just got engaged. AVOID ALL CONTACT WITH FEMALES! THEY DO BAD, WRONG THINGS.
She drives up. Alone. I bring her in. She gives me my laptop. We talk. I get her a glass of water. She chugs it like she's crossed the Sahara. And then says she needs to get going because she has to help her parents move the next morning but she's sorry she didn't remember my laptop last night before I left her car. We chat for a bit. She does indeed look wiped out and we say our goodbyes.
It's really hard to masturbate after something like that. WHERE AM I?!? Keep in mind: I hate head-games but I like this girl. This is the first out-of-my-league girl that I have a halfway decent chance of landing. My high school reunion is on the way. It's probably time. She is an actress which makes her crazy and she is a stoner which means she is always in her head and stoned. On the other, she is such a fucking nerd that she doubted my own nerdiness. I mean, do I have to bring her here of all places to prove it? And I met her on what may be the craziest week of her life. Which is not to say that I'm not busy myself. I've got lots of work lined up AND (on the day I didn't have my laptop) a rewrite due...
I'm in a weird situation. It's a weird situation because this doesn't entirely happen to me often, let alone in Los Angeles where you have to be anorexic to get laid, LET ALONE with a Cute Nerd - relatively famous one at that - who you really happen to like if the universe would straighten itself out in your favor. I'm either in the Friend Zone already with a beautiful young woman whom I really like and should probably stay friends with regardless because she could probably help me in some capacity (I hate this city.)...or I'm overanalyzing this too much and I need to just roll with these perceived head games and just stay the course through the storm of the next week until we can hang out while composing a list of at least ten things a day I can do to make her laugh and also remind her that I am a sexual creature.
Do you gays have it any easier? Or is it basically the same thing?
I had been introduced to her by some mutual friends who were crashing at her place. Keep in mind: she is gorgeous. I don't swing wildly at balls I have no chance of hitting. I'm basically a T-Ball Man. If it's there and safe, I'm in. She. Is. Gorgeous. And a nerd. Massive nerd. So nerdy she doubted my nerdiness. So I'm at her apartment a few nights ago with my friends, thinking I have no chance in hell with this woman. But there we are. It's four in the morning and we're still talking. We part ways and I go home.
Two nights later, it is Game Night at her place. We start playing Clue which everyone becomes incredibly too stoned to play. I'm no pot-smoker anymore and I make it a point not to smoke in Los Angeles because these people do not fuck around with their weed. It is strong. So I'm so off my ass I forget to move my car at 2 in the morning. Game Night things out. Our mutual friends begin making out on her couch and Cute Nerd and I decide to leave. She tells me that she has to pick up her cats from her parents' house and bring them over.
(keeping in mind, Cute Nerd as I've decided to call her looks nothing like she does on her imdb page. Nothing. On that page, she is hot as hell. In real life, she is a cute nerd. That is so much rarer.)
I'm helping her bring her cats-plural over. Three of them. One of them, basically a dinosaur. Shits like one too. This cat threw up, shit, and pissed his crate such that we had to abandon it on the road, bring the cat back, and them continue back to her house to drop the cats off. After which, it was four, we talked for a while, and then I went home with a $58 ticket.
Then Valentine's Eve! I need to know if this chick's got a boyfriend pretty quickly or I'm going to end up doing something and getting hurt - NOTE: this is the rare occasion, I really, really wished I just went for it. I'm a terrible "Go for it"-er because it never entirely works out - so I go to a bar where everyone is at. We talk a little and I'm pulled off to the side by Marisa Mutual Friend who tells me some inside advice: ask her out. Immediately. She likes you. No boyfriend.
I do a party in my head and soon after, Cute Nerd asks me to go help her get her car back from where she parked it. She is subleasing her place to a guy named Anthony and needs to pick up a package before getting her car. So I drive her to the apartment and stand outside. She tells me she'll come back down, smoke me retarded, and we'll see what everyone is up to. So, I start to break down the most adorable way to ask her out in my head.
She comes back down twenty minutes later and I get into her car. Our friends call. They want to go to another bar and back with someone else. It's just us. Me and Cute Nerd. In her car. Getting inebriated.
Then she starts talking about Douchebag Stoner Neighbor. DSN smokes too much weed and reads too much into things, and while she lived there he made it a point to try to kiss her despite her alleged obvious disinterest. He moved onto writing handwritten letters on moleskin to her. It was annoying.
Excuse me for a second:
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!!!!
I can't ask her out now! Not that she just hung out with that guy. That doesn't begin to work! I can't juxtapose DSN with my romantic interests. So I basically say, fuck it. Not tonight. I'll just kick it, be funny, get high, and do this another night...
(me then her)
"When are Zach and Marissa leaving?"
"Thursday. I can't wait. I can't believe I've only known you this long. it's crazy. Things are crazy right now. I'm so tired and these guys are running me dry. And I'm helping my parents move tomorrow. It's just exhausting. I just want to hang out in downtown Los Angeles and explore. We should do that."
(nice.)
"Also, I dig this guy in Chicago - "
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!!!!
" - but I really dig you. I mean, I really, really like your opinion and I want you to read my stuff and I want to read yours, and just hang out. And, like, I think you're really attractive. I'm really attracted to you. And I could be talking out my ass because I don't know if you think the same thing about me and I probably am but -"
(at this point, I'm basically doing the quiet "No, no, no!" but she's still talking and I halfway want to see if it's going to go into the vicinity of "We should fuck in the car right now.")
(also, BTW: kissing mid-sentence needs to become popular again. It would solve so many issues. I'm aware that it's not so I didn't.)
"- even though things are really confusing, I think we should hang out, and mess around and stuff in, like, a non-committal sexual relatio - hold on."
PHONE RINGS! It's Anthony! She begins to argue with Anthony on the phone for the next ten minutes. Mood ruined. The clock begins. I have...God, I don't even know how long before I'm lost in the friend zone forever. During the phone call, she starts driving over to my car to let me out. She is very stoned, very in her head, and very not in the mood anymore. I mention that we should probably make out before the mood is over and she agrees but she's so tired - and looks it. So I leave...
...MY FUCKING LAPTOP IN HER CAR. And for whatever reason, I am too stoned to open my fucking front door because the lock does a thing. So I sleep in my car.
Next morning, she is helping her parents move. I mention my laptop. She says we'll have to reconvene.
Hours go by. I take a shower, job, clean up a bit. I get a text.
"What are you doing in two hours?"
I respond: nothing. Time passes.
"What is your address?"
I mention it w/out Blvd, Ave, or Dr. I ask if we're going out or hanging out.
"Is it blvd, ave, or dr?"
Blvd.
"Great. I'll be there in 45 minutes.
"Now, if there are people in her car, we're going out and that's okay. If there are not people in her car, there is a chance we are hanging out. And I am having sex tonight. I inform my roommates of my situation and the across the board synopsis is that I am probably having sex tonight...
I don't believe in signs but on that day, one of my roommates drove back from Vegas having just broken up with his stripper girlfriend AND a former ex of mine who spent our entire relationship trying to avoid physical encounter with me before she started dating an actor I had cast in the film she was Script Supervising on who was playing a part based on myself (gasp!) just got engaged. AVOID ALL CONTACT WITH FEMALES! THEY DO BAD, WRONG THINGS.
She drives up. Alone. I bring her in. She gives me my laptop. We talk. I get her a glass of water. She chugs it like she's crossed the Sahara. And then says she needs to get going because she has to help her parents move the next morning but she's sorry she didn't remember my laptop last night before I left her car. We chat for a bit. She does indeed look wiped out and we say our goodbyes.
It's really hard to masturbate after something like that. WHERE AM I?!? Keep in mind: I hate head-games but I like this girl. This is the first out-of-my-league girl that I have a halfway decent chance of landing. My high school reunion is on the way. It's probably time. She is an actress which makes her crazy and she is a stoner which means she is always in her head and stoned. On the other, she is such a fucking nerd that she doubted my own nerdiness. I mean, do I have to bring her here of all places to prove it? And I met her on what may be the craziest week of her life. Which is not to say that I'm not busy myself. I've got lots of work lined up AND (on the day I didn't have my laptop) a rewrite due...
I'm in a weird situation. It's a weird situation because this doesn't entirely happen to me often, let alone in Los Angeles where you have to be anorexic to get laid, LET ALONE with a Cute Nerd - relatively famous one at that - who you really happen to like if the universe would straighten itself out in your favor. I'm either in the Friend Zone already with a beautiful young woman whom I really like and should probably stay friends with regardless because she could probably help me in some capacity (I hate this city.)...or I'm overanalyzing this too much and I need to just roll with these perceived head games and just stay the course through the storm of the next week until we can hang out while composing a list of at least ten things a day I can do to make her laugh and also remind her that I am a sexual creature.
Do you gays have it any easier? Or is it basically the same thing?
"How's the despair?"
Starting this thread was a nice idea, Hustler. My wife and I did not spend too much of the day together. Mardi Gras parades start this weekend and our 14 year old daughter, our 12 year old son and 6 year old son all wanted to go to parades with different groups of friends. My wife took charge of the 6 year old and I took charge of the 14 year old. The 12 year old was supervised by the parents of the friends he went with. We all got home late in the evening quite tired. But it was so nice watching our children having a good time with their friends. That happiness enabled my wife and I to spend some wonderful quality time together last night. It was a good day.
The great thing in the world is not so much where we stand, as in what direction we are moving. It's faith in something and enthusiasm for something that makes a life worth living. Oliver Wendell Holmes
