The Official Review Thread of 2023

[anonymous1980]

BLUE BEETLE
Cast: Xolo Maridueña, George Lopez, Susan Sarandon, Adriana Barraza, Damian Alcazar, Elpidia Carrillo, Bruna Marquezine, Raoul Max Trujillo, Belissa Escobedo, Harvey Guillien, voice of Becky G.
Dir: Angel Manuel Soto.

A young man who just came home from college stumbles upon a sentient robotic scarab who attaches itself to him giving him a special suit with abilities and a villainous weapons manufacturer wants it back. The plot is pretty much your standard superhero origin story with all the familiar story beats and all. What makes this film special is its very relatable family-related story line which gives the film both its humor and its heart. The ensemble of actors they assembled playing that family is equally impressive. George Lopez and Adrianna Barraza are standouts. Xolo Maridueña acquits himself well in his first lead role. It's too bad this seems to be underwhelming at the box-office. It's a fairly solid superhero flick.

Oscar Prospects: Visual Effects.

Grade: B+

[anonymous1980]

RED, WHITE & ROYAL BLUE
Cast: Taylor Zakhar Perez, Nicholas Galitzine, Uma Thurman, Clifton Collins Jr., Sarah Shahi, Rachel Hilson, Stephen Fry.
Dir: Matthew Lopez.

The son of the U.S. president and a prince from the British Royal Family get into an altercation. Then after a series of events, they find themselves falling for each other. This is based on a best-selling YA novel, which I haven't read. It follows pretty much your standard romantic comedy tropes, only this time it is a story of two young men falling for each other. The film itself is unremarkable and just a smidge too long but the cast is excellent. The two leads, Taylor Zakhar Perez and Nicholas Galitzine have great on-screen chemistry and their performances pretty much make this film. They're charming, sweet and sexy, basically everything you need to make this type of thing work, even if the script and direction is only a couple of notches above perfunctory. It's no masterpiece but it's a solid watch on Prime Video.

Oscar Prospects: Don't know if it's qualified but likely none.

Grade: B.

[anonymous1980]

65
Cast: Adam Driver, Ariana Greenblatt.
Dirs: Scott Beck & Bryan Woods.

A spaceship crash-lands on Earth with only two survivors, the pilot and a little girl. As it turns out it's the planet Earth 65 million years ago during the time of the dinosaurs. I caught this on Netflix and I have to say I'm glad I didn't spend money to see this. It's a dull mediocrity of a film which pretty much follows all the science-fiction action adventure tropes you'd expect. The concept is interesting but I feel like it's better served as a short film or an episode of The Twilight Zone or Black Mirror which is why that even at 90-plus minutes, it still feels too long. The performances of the two cast members, Adam Driver and Ariana Greenblatt and the decent special effects keeps this from being outright horrible, it is still a missable mediocrity.

Oscar Prospects: Maybe Visual Effects?

Grade: C-

[Sabin]

Here's ol' Sabin, gushing about another summer blockbuster he saw while taking five paragraphs or whatever to talk about why Past Lives isn't a great film and merely a good to very good one. Honestly, I should just show myself the door right now. Well, maybe "gush" is too strong a word but I can't pretend that TMNT: Mutant Mayhem didn't speak to the turtle-head in me. I was obsessed with this franchise when I was roughly 5-10 so my fandom was far from fully formed at the time, but I think what I loved the most about them was that they were a bunch of gross dorks who hung out in the sewers all day and were absolutely themselves. More than X-Men, they lived up to the mutant name. Anyone who felt like a misfit can relate. Well, Rogen/Goldberg get that appeal too, and for the first time the Turtles are recognizable teenagers-- and recognizable. They each have their own personality set that's updated for the modern era. Nerdy Donny isn't a quiet brainiac. He's an outspoken expert. Michaelangelo isn't a loud party animal; he's the youngest, a quietly observant comic-in-training. The mythology is streamlined; all you have to know about Splinter is he hates humans and trained them to become ninja experts (off of a tape he found!) to protect them from the humans. Inspired choices. And while it's clearly indebted to Spider-Verse, it has a vibe all its own with a scribbly animation style as well as Rogen/Goldberg's sensibility, like when the Turtles take action for the first time set to "No Diggity." Aside from a plot we've seen a thousand times (although if one franchise gets to do the "Villain making a weapon that turns everyone into whatever-he-is," it's this one), the biggest problem with this film is just that the turtles are pretty shallow characters. That's actually a big driving force towards why people (children) love them. For a franchise built to capitalize on a wave of angst-fueled comic creations, they're the least angsty characters in comic or movie-history. So the meaningful threshold of catharsis that Miles Morales crossed in Spider-Verse eludes this film. But I had a blast.

Such an exciting time for animation.

[Sabin]

I waited until Disney+ for Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 for a few reasons. Even though I adore the first Guardians film, I'm a little tired of MCU films, it's been six years since the last Guardians film, but most importantly while Vol. 2 isn't the worst MCU film it disappointed me the most with a plot that had no real momentum. I feared the worst from Guardians Vol. 3 early on when I realized the whole thing hinged on a "We have to save Rocket" plot which feels far more television than film, but it's the most I've enjoyed an MCU film in ages. If it didn't have the Rocket origin story told in flashback, I'd think it was an entertaining Guardians film if only because it's the only MCU film that really looks and feels like a movie, full of bright colors, imaginative set-pieces, and some real emotional stakes. But those Rocket flashbacks are really something special. We learn that Rocket was a failed experiment of an evil genius' master plan to create a perfect species, grew up in a cage, and had equally brutalized animal experiments as friends like an otter whose arms have been replaced with cybernetics. If this sounds upsetting, oh, it is. But what I think is so unique about James Gunn's sensibility is that he doesn't look away from these animals. He stares right at them and finds a beauty in them. It even does a reasonably good job at turning how convoluted the MCU is these days into a Guardians feature, not an MCU flaw. Like, Gamora being alive but having no knowledge of her time with Star-Lord, which just plays like another quirky development these Guardians have gotten into.

The biggest problem is it really would've been nice if it came out a couple years earlier. Six years is too long for a sequel. I've already disconnected from the franchise. But I felt the same about Toy Story 3 and 4. I still don't think I desperately needed those films but Guardians Vol. 3 actually lands some emotional development that (as a Guardians fan) I think is pretty crucial for the series. Well worth a watch on Disney+.

[anonymous1980]

HAUNTED MANSION
Cast: LaKeith Stanfield, Rosario Dawson, Owen Wilson, Tiffany Haddish, Danny DeVito, Chase W. Dillon, Jamie Lee Curtis, Jared Leto, Daniel Levy, Winona Ryder.
Dir: Justin Simien.

A single mom inherits the titular Haunted Mansion and hires a physicist and a priest to help get rid of the menacing ghosts. This is Disney's second attempt at making a film out of this famous ride of theirs. I had Guillermo del Toro was once attached and at least some of his material made it to the final film. This explains why there's so many good ideas and potential in this film but it's all jumbled into this tonal and narrative mess of a film. It's such a waste too because it's got a great cast that holds this thing together and some good production values (the visual effects, makeup and design elements are all quite good) so it's still entertaining and watchable. But there are flashes of potential that makes this film a disappointment because it's all underneath a messy mediocrity.

Oscar Prospects: None.

Grade: C.

[Mister Tee]

This may be my favorite horror film of 2023 so far. There are some genuine scares and creepiness here and some really gnarly, gruesome violence.

These sentences underline for me just how distant my movie-going expectation is from that of much of the contemporary audience.

[anonymous1980]

TALK TO ME
Cast: Sophia Wilde, Alexandra Jensen, Miranda Otto, Joe Bird, Otis Dhanji.
Dirs: Michael Philippou & Danny Philippou.

A group of teenagers decide to play a viral game involving contacting the spirits of the dead and momentarily getting possessed by them for clicks and giggles until things go too far and true horror is unleashed. This may be my favorite horror film of 2023 so far. There are some genuine scares and creepiness here and some really gnarly, gruesome violence. The script is surprisingly potent with more depth and character than your average teen horror flick. It is helped by some good performances from its cast composed of mostly relative newcomers including Sophie Wilde who anchors this film with her performance as the main girl. Overall, it's a solid spooky horror flick that's well worth watching.

Oscar Prospects: None.

Grade: B+

[anonymous1980]

FLAMIN' HOT
Cast: Jesse Garcia, Annie Gonzalez, Dennis Haysbert, Emilio Rivera, Tony Shalhoub, Matt Walsh.
Dir: Eva Longoria.

This is the story about the inventor of Flamin' Hot Cheetos. Yep, you read that right. It's the amazing true story about how he went from being a dirt poor janitor in the company to inventing a product line that would give him a giant promotion and millions in the bank. Apparently, this story has been publicly disputed. After watching it, I can definitely see how people have called it fictitious since it's so formulaic in almost every step of the way. The performances are good, the film is well put-together and I wasn't bored but it's barely better than a made for TV movie in the '80s and '90s. So, it's a fine time killer, no more no less.

Oscar Prospects: Maybe for Original Song?

Grade: C+

[anonymous1980]

JOY RIDE
Cast: Ashley Park, Sherry Cola, Stephanie Hsu, Sabrina Wu, Daniel Dae Kim, Ronnie Chieng, Timothy Simons, Meredith Hagner, David Denman, Annie Mumolo.
Dir: Adele Lim.

An Asian adoptee and her childhood best friend along with a cousin and a college friend go on a road trip in Beijing trying to find her birth mother and along the way get into naughty hijinks. This is a hard-R sex comedy written, directed and starring Asian-Americans and such a thing is of course a rarity....and it's quite good. The jokes don't always land but when they do, it is hilarious. But the intelligent script wisely crafts likable, relatable and believable characters and that makes the comedy funnier and also makes the touching and even dramatic parts near the end not at all jarring even with wackiness that preceded it. The lead quartet of actors (Ashley, Park, Sherry Cola, Stephanie Hsu, Sabrina Wu) are all terrific. Overall, a solid comedy worthy of your time.

Oscar Prospects: None.

Grade: B+

THEY CLONED TYRONE
Cast: John Boyega, Teyonah Parris, Jamie Foxx, David Alan Grier, Kiefer Sutherland.
Dir: Juel Taylor.

An unlikely trio: A drug dealer, a pimp and prostitute uncover a disturbing secret about their 'hood. That's pretty much all I should give you. I think it is best to watch this crazy Netflix film as cold as possible. It's basically a blaxploitation film that riffs on various genres including film noir, science fiction, mystery, paranoia thrillers, etc. with a very healthy sprinkling of humor and social commentary as well. It is quite frankly a joy to watch and the cast are all game, playing it up to the hilt. The twists are genuinely surprising and they manage to weave in some heady subject matter as well. Writer-director Juel Taylor is a fascinating filmmaking voice that I'm looking forward to seeing more of. Again, this is on Netflix and is one of the best things on there right now.

Oscar Prospects: Don't know if this is eligible but it wouldn't be out of place as an Original Screenplay candidate.

Grade: A-

[anonymous1980]

Happy Barbenheimer weekend!

OPPENHEIMER
Cast: Cillian Murphy, Emily Blunt, Matt Damon, Robert Downey Jr., Kenneth Branagh, Florence Pugh, Josh Hartnett, Casey Affleck, Rami Malek, Benny Safdie, Alden Ehrenreich, Dane DeHaan, David Krumholtz, Gary Oldman.
Dir: Christopher Nolan.

This is a biopic and character study of J. Robert Oppenheimer, the scientist who lead in the development of the atomic bomb. This is a three-hour biopic that's mostly talking but trust director Christopher Nolan to turn it nto a truly gripping pulse pounding thriller. This film tackles a lot of history, science and politics yet somehow turns it into pop entertainment as exciting or even more exciting than any action scene in any tentpole Hollywood flick. The fantastic central performance of Cillian Murphy is instrumental here. He makes Oppenheimer a fascinating figure. And he is supported by a stellar supporting cast with Robert Downey Jr. and Emily Blunt as the standouts. This MAY be Christopher Nolan's best work but it's certainly in the upper-tier. And it's one of the best films of the year so far.

Oscar Prospects: Picture, Director, Actor, Supporting Actor, Supporting Actress, Adapted Screenplay, Cinematography, Film Editing, Sound, Production Design, Original Score, Visual Effects, Makeup & Hairstyling.

Grade: A

BARBIE
Cast: Margot Robbie, Ryan Gosling, America Ferrera, Will Ferrell, Kate McKinnon, Arianna Greenblatt, Michael Cera, Issa Rae, Rhea Perlman, Alexandra Shipp, Hari Nef, Simu Liu, Kingsley Ben-Adir, voice of Helen Mirren.
Dir: Greta Gerwig.

Weird things start to happen to pierce the idealistic existence of a stereotypical Barbie in Barbieland so she ventures into the Real World to fix it and tagging along for the ride is Ken. A live-action movie based on Barbie? Eh. Directed by Greta Gerwig? Intriguing! And it looks like my instincts are right. While this is a Barbie movie through and through, writer-director Greta Gerwig turns the concept on its head and turns it into a smorgasbord of a a film. It is both a critique and celebration of its subject matter, a satire on gender, feminism and the patriarchy and even a deep reflection on existentialism. This is all wrapped up in a mish-mash of laughs, musical numbers and eye-popping bright colored visuals. Margot Robbie is excellent but Ryan Gosling definitely steals it as Ken and gives one of the funniest on-screen performance this year. While I see why some people may not dig it, I walked away thinking this is one of the joyful experiences I had in a cinema in a while. Yes, one of the best films of the year.

Oscar Prospects: I think Supporting Actor, Production Design, Costume Design and Original Song are strong possibilities. Picture, Director, Actress, Adapted Screenplay, will depend on how the year shakes out.

Grade: A.

[anonymous1980]

MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE - DEAD RECKONING PART ONE
Cast: Tom Cruise, Hayley Atwell, Ving Rhames, Simon Pegg, Rebecca Ferguson, Esai Morales, Henry Czerny, Vanessa Kirby, Pom Klementieff, Shea Whigham, Greg Tarzan Davis, Cary Elwes, Frederick Schmidt.
Dir: Christopher McQuarrie.

The seventh installment of the Mission: Impossible franchise has Ethan Hunt and his team going after a key that could control or destroy a sentient A.I. program that's taking over the world. Tom Cruise once again did the, ahem, impossible and made a seventh installment of an almost thirty year old franchise still fresh and exciting. This is pop entertainment at its finest. Though the script is not the most original or groundbreaking, it's extremely well-constructed...which is important because it makes the truly exciting action set pieces work. Cruise once again proves no one quite does it like him and Hayley Atwell, as the new "girl" and Esai Morales as the villain both make fine additions to the franchise. Suffice to say, I'll definitely be there for Part Two.

Oscar Prospects: Deserves Visual Effects, Editing, Score and Sound.

Grade: A-

[Sabin]

On a script level, Joy Ride has an identity crisis about its identity crisis. The first two thirds of it are a raucous Bridesmaids-style road trip comedy about four Asian-American women going on a journey of self-discovery until it lands in some pretty unexpected territory about one of the character's backstory and gear-shifts towards indie dramedy-ville away from basically everything it set up (like the entire business deal!). I have no idea if that was a product of reshoots or if it was like that on the page. I wasn't quite invested enough in the characters as three-dimensional human beings to really go with the turn on full ticket price but it's worth a stream for a terrific supporting performance by Stephanie Hsu as an engaged actress who doesn't want her fiancé to know about her sexual past so she poses as a virgin (despite having a very embarrassing tattoo). I wasn't sold on Hsu after Everything Everywhere All At Once but I am now. She's hilarious. Oh, great first scene too.

I just learned that Joy Ride cost over $30m to produce. Yikes. It's not going to make that back.

[anonymous1980]

MISSING
Cast: Storm Reid, Nia Long, Joaquin de Almeida, Ken Leung, Amy Landacker, Tim Griffin, Daniel Henney, Megan Suri.
Dirs: Nick Johnson, Will Merrick.

A teenage girl uses the internet and social media to try and find out what happened to her mother who disappeared while vacationing in Colombia with her new boyfriend. This is a sequel of sorts to the rather inventive thriller Searching which also uses the same conceit which I happen to like quite a bit. They have a slightly bigger canvass this time and it's a little less successful. While the mystery is intriguing and it really sucks you in, the big twists and reveals are a bit too convoluted and the film goes on for far too long. Storm Reid's performance holds it all together and manages to make it a very watchable and solid thriller overall. It's far from top-tier but you could do a lot worse.

Oscar Prospects: None.

Grade: B.

[Sonic Youth]

Up next in the ongoing series called "Gawd, I Must Really Love My Daughter To Sit Thru This"... here's Elemental.

A lot of people have pointed out that the concept of this film is almost like someone's parody of a PIXAR film

Yes, that would be me. The second I heard the premise, I thought "The well has finally run dry. Next movie, they should create a world populated by anthropomorphic members of the periodic table." I imagined an SNL skit of a panicky Pixar board meeting, desperate for new ideas. "Hey, about about a world where the four elements make a community together, they work, raise families, etc?" Admittedly, I thought the same thing about Luca, and yet despite that movie's allegiance to formula, it still managed to feel fresh and inventive, as if someone approached the studio and said "Pixar, here's a dull idea for a movie, complete with scrappy best female friend lifted entirely from 'Up'. It's set in an Italian fishing town, have we done Italy yet? Now, take these cliches and make the best movie anyone could expect out of this. Double dare ya!" They impossibly succeeded with Luca, but definitely not here.

I'll start with what I liked best about the film, and that's the score. All throughout there is a hypnotic if slightly dinky trip-hoppy techno-lite soundscape, unlike anything I've ever heard in any other Pixar film. It was unexpected and a very pleasant surprise, and it provided the only real excitement. I had no idea until I saw the credits that Thomas Newman was the composer. He's really come quite a long way since American Beauty's marimbas.

I remember how "Turning Red" began, with Mellin Lee introducing the film with "Honoring your parents sounds great, but if you take it too far, well, you might forget to honor yourself. *record scratch* Luckily, I don't have that problem!" Well, Ember the flamegirl does have that problem, and she brings to the film every stale line and plot development along with it, wringing every dribble of mawkish sentimentality out of the premise. Basically, Ember is expected to take over the family business, but she doesn't want to. You've seen it at least a hundred times before, and you're familliar with all the emotional beats. There is one difference, though. Unless I totally missed it (it's possible it was mentioned fleetingly), I don't think we ever learned what it was Ember DID want to do! Maybe she's a secret landscaper or origami artist or something that you wouldn't think would mix well with fire. That would have led to other narrative cliches, but at least it would have provided more comic moments and fleshed out the protagonist a bit.

Now, you're reading this and may be thinking "Okay, I understand the premise. What does any of that have to do with the four elements?" Well, yeah, that's the other problem. There's no reason why this premise had to be set in the world of four elements, and nothing particular about it that makes the idea of setting it in a different imaginary world utterly unthinkable. In other words... this being Pixar, it does have its quirks and modest displays of invention when depcting a world of the four elements living in the same community. But there's no overall vision here. It's a setting that seems to have been chosen after a 25 year long process of elmination, and a story that only serves as an excuse to present this setting.

Oh, and for those who keep track of these things, there's no villain. And it really could have used one. And did I mention the forbidden love story, between fire and water. Such a concept is the very definition of "chaste".

In a way, Pixar is a victim of its own success. Had the movie come out in the late 90s, visually it would have been a dazzler. And it probably is, objectively speaking. But they set the bar super-high many times, and they've reached it many times over the years. But it's not as awe-inspiring as it used to be. We know what Pixar is capable of, and what was once breathtaking has now settled to merely comforting. (It doesn't help that the city created here felt a lot like the one in Zootopia, Disney's most Pixar-like film.) But there's a bigger problem, and I'll admit this could just be me. The majority of characters here are made of fire and water, a gas and a liquid. Whether they are people, animals or inanimate objects come to life, all the characters in a Pixar film share this quality: they are solid objects. And they are relatable as such. But as there is nothing solid about these slightly amorphous characters. They are always burning and shimmering and rippling, which made it difficult for me to focus on them - or relate to them - as actual objects. It was like staring at a therapist's hypno-wheel for 2 hours.

Like any studio, Pixar has its ups and downs, but it was always sincere in its entertainment. (Bear in mind I haven't seen any sequels other than Toy Story.) And sincerity is a precious resource when inspiration fails, especially in this Trump-tainted world. What a sad day it will be once the sincerity runs out.

(ETA: My daughter loved it.)